Posted by: robinsonwarner | October 23, 2009

Hipster Definition Update

One thing that came up while discussing hipsters with my very dear friend Jon was that all hipsters suffer from what is clinically called “Hipster Denial”.  Hipster Denial, which isn’t just a river in Hipster Egypt, involves the hipster in question denying all claims of being a hipster when labeled as such by his or her peers.  Hipsters, who sometimes have non-hipster friends, might be jokingly called hipsters by their friends because that’s what friends are for:  to call out their friends for being giant tools.  Those suffering from Hipster Denial will generally scoff, furrow up their brow and argue, very convincingly, “No, I’m not.”  As convincing as this kind of logic is, if it looks like a duck, walks like a duck, and smells like a duck, it might just be a hipster.

Treatment for Hipster Denial involves a healthy dose of perspective, a large mirror used twice a day, a razor (preferably Mach 3), dictionary for definition of “irony” to administered thrice daily, and finally, friends to make fun of the hipster which is used to stunt the nascent stages of megalomania

Hipsters, while ascribing to a belief system that shuns all forms of social characterization and mass culture, have in turn created a form of social characterization and mass culture.  Unable to deal with the fact that hipsterism has noticeable character traits and an appropriate label that is self-defeating to their original mission statement, hipsters, in order to prevent their brains from exploding, must be in denial.

A person must share the genotypic and phenotypic traits of a hipster in order to be considered one.  You could be drinking Pabst Blue Ribbon ironically, wearing skinny jeans, a retro t-shirt, ironic penny loafers you got from your grandfather, a hilarious mustache, and black box frame glasses, but that person might be lacking the particular brand of condescension and cultural disdain (i.e. indy douche) to be considered a full on hipster.  You might be a really cool person that just dresses strangely.


If you’re interested in reading the original post that discusses hipsters, take a look here.


  1. Man, those JibJab guys crack me up.

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